Seen on the run (June 23, 2019)

Riprap/Wildcat loop

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It was a beautiful day, I’ve just been feeling so far from 100% lately. We had to say goodbye to Molly last weekend. I got a little more sleep this week just because I’m not sick with worry about her anymore. Now I’m just so damn sad. The house feels empty and it hurts. I love that girl so much.

 

 

Seen on the run (June 9, 2019)

Misty Foggy Rainy

South on the AT from Rockfish gap

A busy morning on the trail. Close to a dozen thru hikers, plus a few runners and day hikers.

We had planned to do at least 13, but neither of us was feeling very energetic. We turned around at the shelter so ended up with just over 9 miles for the day.

My attitude was much better though. Even though I was exhausted, I was still happy to be in the woods.

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Seen on the run (May 26, 2019)

Riprap/Wildcat loop Cranky irritable annoyed exhausted anxious sad My cousin died Molly is sick again I can’t remember the last time I slept through the night I checked my hydration pack after Promise Land and couldn’t find a leak. I filled it up the night before this run and refrigerated it overnight. When I pulled it out in the morning there was no sign of leakage. Five minutes into the run my back and legs were soaked. By mile 6 I was out of fluid. It was hot. Fuck it. I hate rocky, technical downhill. Why did I choose this route? Oh yeah. I wanted to see the Rhododendrons. And jump in the swimming hole. There were a few Rhododendrons here and there. I tried to feel happy. I mostly just felt tired. There were people at the swimming hole. I felt self-conscious. And I really just wanted to get home and check on Molly. Two thousand feet of climbing in the last 2.5 miles. In the heat. Brian shared his water. *When I got home I discovered a crack in the small plastic piece that connects the tube to the bladder in my hydration pack. I’ve had it for maybe 9 months.

Seen on the run (April 7, 2019)

Humpback Rocks loop and Dobie Mountain loop

I headed up to Humpback Rocks first.

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I thought I was too late for the sunrise, but was pleasantly surprised.

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It was gorgeous.

There were already quite a few people up there enjoying the view. That made me happy. We should all do this more often.

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People were camping at every campsite I passed. It was cool to see so many people at the shelter, too.

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While I definitely enjoy solitude and generally try to avoid crowds, the trails were eerily empty this winter. It’s nice to see them coming back to life.

My foot felt a lot better when I woke up this morning and it only bothered me for the first couple miles of the run. After that I hardly noticed it at all.

It hurts a little now, though. Not sure what that means.

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Seen on the run (April 6, 2019)

Four easy miles on the Monticello trail.

Just me.

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The anxiety crazies are back. And/or I’m injured. It’s just so much fun that I can never tell the difference. The pain always feels very real.

My toe started hurting at mile 5 of my run on Wednesday. I cut my run short, but I thought I was just being overly cautious. It didn’t hurt so bad that I couldn’t run on it.

I was planning to run Friday morning, but I decided not to because the toe was still hurting (I did a lot of walking around on Wednesday and Thursday). I also spent a lot of time Googling everything I could think of involving running and toe injuries. Stress fractures of the metatarsals are common in runners, but stress fractures of the phalanges (which is where my pain is) are not.

It could be metatarsalgia. There is some pain under the toe. And my second toe is longer than my big toe. And I always have a callus in that spot.

Or it could all be in my head.

Or just mostly in my head.

The fun is that there is no way to know.

I nearly made myself sick worrying about whether I should try to do a long group run this morning. There were two that I really wanted to do. One was a training run on the Promise Land 50k course. But I also knew I didn’t want to drive all the way down to Lynchburg when I wasn’t sure if I’d even be able to do the run. I wasn’t even sure if I wanted the hassle of driving to Sugar Hollow and meeting up with a group only to possibly have to turn around after a mile or two.

By the time I went to bed last night I was pretty sure I was just going to do a short easy run in town to test it out. Then, if all was fine I could still do my own long(ish) run on Sunday. I’m not convinced that I should be running 20+ miles on consecutive weekends anyway.

The run was fine. My toe was just a little achy.

I walked to the City Market afterward though and it hurt. Not bad enough to make me limp. Just bad enough to keep me guessing.

Fun with anxiety and running.